Reasons Why Some Kids Have Low Self-Esteem
Despite your best efforts to encourage your child, they still struggle with low self-esteem. What’s going on? Kids who lack confidence often struggle in many areas of life, including academics, social connection, and the willingness to try hard things. It can be helpful to take a step back and consider WHY they struggle with confidence in themselves—because that will inform the best steps forward to build their resilience and self-esteem from the root.
Possible Causes of Low Self-Esteem in Kids:
Neural Pathways and Brain Differences Related to Low Self-Esteem
The brain is wired from birth with predispositions in many facets, but we also know that personality and self-perception are learned behaviors in many ways. It’s complex—genetics, environmental factors, and personal experience can all have a role to play in developing a child’s self-esteem, for better or for worse.
If a child is struggling with confidence or resilience, it can be helpful to take a step back and consider what things in their life or family history may be contributing to the lower sense of self. In addition, as parents, there’s a lot of power in the words we say and the attitudes we take both towards ourselves (in modeling healthy self-esteem) and in how we build up or tear down our kids. Some are more susceptible than others to criticism, so it’s important to take each child as an individual and respond accordingly.
Read More: Tips to Help Hesitant Students Gain Confidence >>
Chronic Stress and Trauma
Chronic stress and trauma (whether acute or past) can have a profound impact on the developing brain. Cortisol and other stress hormones directly affect brain function in areas related to memory and emotional regulation, leading to struggles with learning and functioning in day-to-day life. Helping our kids learn to handle stress in a healthy way is key to unlocking their ability to see themselves in a positive light and overcome patterns of negative self-perception.
Weak Cognitive Skills
A third area that can contribute to low self-esteem in kids is weak cognitive skills. When learning, focusing, reading, remembering, and thinking are hard, it creates a chronic stress environment in the brain all the time.
Read More: Signs of Weak Cognitive Skills in Struggling Students >>
Think about it… when a kid with attention difficulties or other learning challenges is in school for 8+ hours per day, they’re living in their weakness, stressing out their brain, and doing things that are hard all the time. This takes a toll on the brain, its ability to learn, and their own view of themselves because of how much they feel like they’re failing or falling behind.
While accommodations are a temporary solution to help kids with learning struggles access the material in school, they are not a permanent change in the way the brain will function.
Weak cognitive skills translate to struggles outside the classroom as well, and if we’re not dealing with the root cause, then those struggles are going to continue in relationships, on the sports field, when driving, or in a job down the road.
The key to building a child’s resilience and positive self-esteem is to improve the way their brain is able to interact with the world around them.
There’s a reason that so many clients who complete a brain training program at LearningRx report improved confidence as one of their biggest gains.* When the brain is strong, when it’s able to problem-solve, pay attention, remember more, and think more efficiently, then a child’s brain is “unlocked” and they are able to see all that they’re capable of.
Helping Kids with Low Self-Esteem Starts in the Brain
Mindset work, counseling, and teaching stress management techniques are all important tools to supporting our kids’ mental health—but don’t neglect also making sure their brain is wired for efficient processing of the world around them.
Learning struggles act like chronic stress or trauma in the brain, and when we allow these things to continue for years, it’s no wonder that our kids struggle to have a high view of themselves.
You can build cognitive skills and change the way the brain is wired. Click here to contact us today and get started on the journey to confidence and easier learning!
*Results of past clients. Outcomes may vary.
